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Love Language Assessment Calculator
Discover how you give and receive love in relationships
About This Assessment: This tool is based on Dr. Gary Chapman's 5 Love Languages concept. It's designed to help you understand how you prefer to give and receive love in relationships. Remember, most people have a combination of love languages, with one or two being primary.
Assessment Questions
1. What couldn't you live without in your dream relationship?
2. If your partner makes a mistake, how would you prefer they make it up to you?
3. What's the sign of a great friendship?
4. How would you know someone's meant to be on a first date?
5. To create intimacy, what would you be most likely to do?
6. What kind of partner would bother you most?
7. What routine would you love in a relationship?
8. What do you feel like you're great at in relationships?
9. Ugh, you've had a bad day. How can your partner help?
10. What's your favorite thing a friend's ever done for you?
11. On a major anniversary, I'd love to receive:
12. In your dream relationship, spontaneity looks like:
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The 5 Love Languages
Words of Affirmation
You crave verbal connection and emotional communication. Compliments, loving words, and heartfelt ex...
Physical Touch
Physical intimacy is how you best give and receive affection. This includes both sexual and non-sexu...
Quality Time
You believe spending time together is the most meaningful way to show love. You appreciate when some...
Receiving Gifts
Thoughtful, tangible gestures are the most meaningful form of affection to you. The gift's size or c...
Acts of Service
You appreciate when others go out of their way to make your life easier. Actions speak louder than w...
Relationship Tips
Communicate Your Language
Share your results with your partner to help them understand how you feel loved.
Learn Their Language
Ask your partner to take this assessment so you can learn how they prefer to receive love.
Practice Regularly
Make an effort to express love in your partner's language, even if it's not your natural way.
Understanding the 5 Love Languages
What Are Love Languages?
The 5 Love Languages is a concept developed by Dr. Gary Chapman in his 1992 book. It describes five ways people express and experience love: Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, and Acts of Service.
Why They Matter
Understanding love languages helps prevent miscommunication in relationships. When partners express love in different ways, they may not feel appreciated even when both are trying. Knowing each other's love languages creates deeper connection and intimacy.
Beyond Romantic Relationships
Love languages apply to all relationships—friendships, family, parent-child bonds, and more. Understanding how different people in your life prefer to receive appreciation can improve all your relationships.
Common Misconceptions
Myth: You only have one love language
Reality: Most people have a primary and secondary love language. Your preferences can also change over time.
Myth: Partners must have the same love language
Reality: Different love languages are normal. The key is learning to speak each other's language.
Myth: Love languages excuse bad behavior
Reality: Love languages enhance healthy relationships but aren't a substitute for respect, communication, or addressing harmful behaviors.
Pro Tip: Make a habit of expressing love in your partner's primary language at least once a week, even if it doesn't come naturally to you. Small, consistent efforts make a big difference.
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